The Simpsons Try MMA
Marge Simpson via flying arm bar for the submission win? Bart with a deep triangle on Nelson? It could be. The Simpsons last episode — “The Great Wife Hope” — features The Simpsons both enjoying and protesting MMA. There is even a cameo from Chuck Liddell. Boy he sure is getting around the TV, isn’t he? Here is the full episode:
Bernard Hopkins Adds Homophobia to His Racism
It’s always good to be well-rounded, so Bernard Hopkins has added some homophobic comments to his repertoire:
“Everybody is different but I don’t want to watch two grown men wrestling with panties on. I’m from the hood, we don’t play that. To me, I’m not buying a ticket to watch two grown men with panties on, sweating, with nuts in their face. That’s not me. To compare that to boxing is ludicrous. It’s a porno – it’s an entertainment porno. I’m not wrestling a guy with panties on and his nuts in my face.
I’m not criticizing people for what kind of entertainment they like. I think most of those people have chains and masks in their closets. There is something out there for everybody. I can understand if 90% of women were going to those things but I can’t understand a grown man sitting there with a couple of guys watching two grown men with panties on, sweating. That’s just my opinion. It’s not a good look.”
Remember, this is the same man that said to Joe Calzaghe:
“You’re not even in my league! I would never let a white boy beat me. I would never lose to a white boy. I couldn’t go back to the projects if I let a white boy beat me.”
So Rush Limbaugh can’t get a football team but we’ve got nothing for crazy Bernard Hopkins? Sorry Bernard. Your sport is D-E-A-D. If boxing scumbags like Bob Arum and Hopkins want to cast aspersions on MMA, then try this one for their sport: Boxing fans are too dumb to understand the intricacies of MMA. It’s like trying to teach chess to a bunch of checkers players. Don’t believe me? Just check the comments on that post. They don’t get it.
Junie Browning Apologizes For Death Threats
Junie Browning has issued a video apology for his recent outburst of threats and violence. Browning was recently admitted to a Nevada hospital after he allegedly tried to commit suicide. He assaulted some nurses and told them he would “kill and rape their family” when they tried to intervene and provide treatment.
The kid has a ton of talent. As cocky as he may seem, he has some self-esteem issues and obviously some other problems. Here’s hoping Junie gets it right and gets the help he needs. He also needs a job. The UFC cut him from their active roster after this latest incident.
10 Coaches For The Ultimate Fighter
5 sets of 2 coaches for the next season of “The Ultimate Fighter”…
Phil Baroni and Matt Serra
New York vs. New Jersey. Big Mouth against Bigger Mouth. There wouldn’t be any title implications, but these are 2 characters that would surely entertain us.
Marcus Davis and Dan Hardy
No love lost here. These 2 had a war of words leading up to their war in the cage. You know Davis wants at Hardy again. Would they even make it to their scheduled fight before letting it fly?
Michael Bisping and Kendall Grove
These 2 were both members of “Team Ortiz” on Season 3 of TUF. Grove is vibrant and brash and certainly wouldn’t take any crap from Bisping. And after his devastating knockout by Dan Henderson, would we see a different, mellower Bisping?
Sean Sherk and Joe Stevenson
Two guys that each have 35 or more wins. Two guys that have fought most of the best fighters in their division. Except each other. I think Sherk vs. Stevenson would be an awesome fight. Kimbo can drop by and take notes on the wrestling clinic.
Brock Lesnar and Frank Mir
A season of TUF leading up to a fight between these two would be awesome. Maybe Lesnar loses to Carwin and these 2 get in line for a title shot. Whatever–the scenario is not important. I want to see them fight again.
Athletes That Could’ve Been MMA Fighters
This season of “The Ultimate Fighter” has 4 former NFL players as competitors. Shaq trains MMA, Cardinals backup QB Matt Leinart trains. Even Jose Canseco has had some MMA bouts. With that in mind here are some pros that we think would have been fierce MMA fighters.
Ray Lewis |
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Ray Lewis is known for his intensity, energy and desire to win. He lives to punish people on the football field. For him football is like MMA – you keep going until someone doesn’t get up. He’s super fast, 6′1″ 250 lb. and he’d never stop fighting. He’d surely never tap. He’d also redefine “Epic Staredown”. Nobody would bring it more than Lewis. |
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Nolan Ryan |
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He may be retired but remember that fight with White Sox third baseman Robin Ventura? Classic dirty boxing that would’ve made Randy Couture cry with pride. Ryan showed bad-assery at age 46 against a much younger Ventura. In the offseason Ryan wrestled with and branded steer on his ranch. One can only imagine how nasty Ryan’s clinch game would’ve been. |
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Alicia Sacramone |
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Grapplers dream of her flexibility. She could easily pick up Eddie Bravo’s flavor of Jiu-Jitsu given her attributes. Plus, she has an underrated left hook. Remember this video? Another thing Alicia has is strength. Gymnasts are known for having most functional strength among athletes. A lot of fighters incorporate gymnastics body work/exercises into their strength routines. Plus, don’t forget the attitude. After all, there’s a reason they don’t call it gym-nice-tics. |
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Kyle Farnsworth |
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The Farns is big, strong and has just enough crazy in him to make the fighter across from him very nervous. He kicked an electric fan so hard he sprained his knee and had to go on the DL. He shot in on Paul Wilson, took him down with ease and bloodied his face. Or how about his awesome double-leg and slam of Jeremy Affeldt? At 6′5″ 240, with tree trunks for legs, Farns would have made Cro Cop look small. |
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Adrian Wilson |
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Adrian Wilson is 6′3″ 230 lbs of mean. He can jump 66 inches off the ground — see it right here — and he has a standing vertical of almost 40. Athletic ability is great to have in MMA, but Wilson is also one of he hardest hitters in all of football. Wilson has received a few unnecessary roughness penalties in his career. “Probably about 100% of the time the hits I do make, they’re kind of violent, and that’s what they probably see is the violent part of the hit.” |
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Carlos Zambrano
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Carlos Zambrano has already had 2 nicknames that were good enough for MMA: “El Toro” and “Big Z”. They are both spot on. Zambrano is 6′5″ 255, and his temper is exactly like that of a bull. He disfigured the face of former teammate Michael Barrett in a brawl that started in the dugout and made its way to the clubhouse. He beat the tar out of a Gatorade machine. You don’t mess with the Zambrano. |
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Shaq |
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Shaq already trains Gracie Jits and Muay Thai. He would have no problem putting anyone in a triangle choke with those super-long legs. Also, imagine catching a flying knee from him. Being over 7 feet tall he’d have no problem landing a head kick on Lesnar or any other heavyweight. He also has his first opponent in mind. He wants to take on Hong Man Choi. |
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Tie Domi |
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Domi made a career in the NHL by taking on — and usually beating up — much bigger players. His bouts with Bob Probert were legendary. He once knocked Scott Niedermayer unconscious with a vicious elbow. When a taunting fan fell through the glass into the team bench, Domi pinned him and started throwing. And his nickname is MMA-ready too: “The Albanian Assassin”. |
Have any to add to the list? Let us know in the comments section.
UFC 1 Video: Where It All Began
Where it all began for the UFC. This video has the dominant Jiu-Jitsu of Royce Gracie, Ken Shamrock’s killer heel hook and Gerard Gordeau’s brain-scrambling head kick.
Tito Ortiz Won’t Be Bothered By the Homeless
Former UFC star Tito Ortiz (back in the UFC but no longer a star) wants you to know:
- He’s from the streets
- He likes the word “Dawg”
- He used to wash cars
- He’s not charitable and won’t help the homeless
Ortiz might need a new opponent for his UFC 106 bout, as he claims Mark Coleman has withdrawn from that event. Whoever replaces Coleman and battles Tito in the octagon will get my support.
When MMA Gets Bloody
Sometimes an MMA fight can end without either combatant getting hurt. You could get a quick sub where one of the fighters has to tap. Or even a flash knockout where the fight is called but the fighter is fine just seconds later.
But other times it’s two warriors going to war. Elbows can gash skin down to the bone. Fights can get very bloody. Here are 11 of the biggest gashes and blood lettings and from MMA. That’s right — this one goes up to 11.
1. Joe “Daddy” Stevenson
No, Stevenson was not attacked by PETA for wearing fur. He was just in an all-out brawl.
2. Drew Montgomery
Makes sense that Montgomery fights for the Carnage Fight Team.
3. Abe Wagner
This is from the current season of “The Ultimate Fighter”. I wonder if he still wants that UFC contract?
4. Fedor Emelianenko
No, not even the greatest mixed martial artist of our era is exempt from massive gashes. Here, doctors check out Fedor’s new coin purse.
5. Stefan Struve
Here Struve seems to be in control of everything in the fight, except his leaky faucet.
6. Chris Lytle
“Lights Out” never fails to put on an entertaining fight for the fans. But if he were to lose any more blood in this pic, it would be lights out for him.
7. Kazushi Sakuraba
That eye gets any more swollen and Sakuraba is going to float away. Or explode.
8. Marvin Eastman
This was the result of some Vitor Belfort knees and strikes. I would say a few too many of them.
9. Cub Swanson
“Cub” looks like he was attacked by a bear. A bear named Jose Aldo. I think the cutman realizes his little swab is useless.
10. Jared Hess
Read “Round 3″ of the bout description here. Jared Hess is a warrior.
11. Kalib Starnes
The quote: “The doctor spread the cut open with his thumbs and said, “I can see his skull, I’m stopping it’.” And Starnes wanted to continue the fight. Wow.
Behind the Scenes of Dancing with the Stars with Chuck Liddell
Chuck Liddell’s star is still shining bright. Although, these days his star is shining on ‘Dancing with the Stars’ and not in the cage where we are used to seeing him. I just saw this video of Chuck helping to promote UFC 104 by walking around asking his Dancing with the Stars colleagues who they think will win. I think you’ll find his chat with Michael Irvin interesting. Irvin looks like he has some moves. Nice bob and weave…
Kimbo Needs a Second Opinion
The Big Black Buck — as Rashad Evans refers to Kimbo Slice — might want to re-watch his fight against Roy Nelson. Why? Because here is what Kimbo said before the show aired on Wednesday night:
“This fight is very exciting. This is probably, I would say, not hands down, but pound-for-pound a good fight, one of my best fights…I was impressed with my performance. I was impressed with everything. I’m not crying about nothing.”
Perhaps that was some salesmanship on his part. But if he truly believes that he might want to get a second opinion. Like mine. Before that though, you can check out the fight here if you want to watch it.
Slice was basically dominated by Roy Nelson. Slice moved well and had some decent takedown defense. But he was not the aggressor and certainly didn’t land anything devastating. At the end of the first round, Nelson took Kimbo down and trapped an arm to get him in the crucifix position with :32 left. He started punching Slice at around :27. Though the punches from Nelson were not punishing, they were landing and Kimbo was unable to defend himself. The fight should have been stopped before the end of the round.
In round 2 Nelson had his way again with Kimbo, this time sealing the deal. Not everyone was impressed with Nelson’s win or his methods. From Bloody Elbow:
Nelson knew that it was simply a matter of Kimbo intelligently defending himself, which was an impossibility with both hands locked down. I found it a bit disheartening to hear Nelson state that he would simply go for those unanswered shots while knowing that a lot of power wasn’t needed. I understand that it’s part of the rules, and perhaps Nelson was simply trying to be the “nice guy” in the entire situation by stopping Kimbo in the most non-damaging way possible.
Why is it disheartening? Because Nelson actually used the conventional game plan for Kimbo? He’s going for a six-figure deal with the UFC. Should he have stood and banged with Kimbo to appease the masses? Not at all. He wants to win, period. Nelson wasn’t trying to be the “nice guy” in anything. He’s trying to move his career forward. There’s nothing disheartening in that. Any other gameplan would have been foolish.
And as nice a guy as Kimbo seems, the truth remains that if he was not all over You Tube and and a headliner on the Elite XC bouts, he’s nowhere even close to sniffing a spot on TUF, let alone a UFC deal.
TapouT Kimbo Slice Red Evil T-Shirt
